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It is rare indeed that I am dragged out for a night, and I usually prefer a drink after work to dancing to the small hours (especially at this time of year)
So it was that chance found me, b/f and a couple of other good friends are at a bar, indulging in our most favourite of pass times - bitching cattily about acquaintences or passers by, occasionally diverting to bitch about politics or start a small rhetoric war on the quality of various alcohols.
So it was that M came in with her new friend.
It has to be noted that her male friend is NOT a b/f or love interest of any kind. Nor is he auditioning for the part. Honest. Really. Look she made it ABUNDANTLY clear to him and all of us. Definitely. uh-huh...
So she and her friend plop themselves down, order drinks and make small talk. We bitch some more, drink some more, tear apart a guy's outfit, some random groping, the usual; when M reveals her true intent.
M: *whispering* Test him guys.
Me: *sighs*
B/f: *rolls eyes*
Both: *FLIRT with friend*
All will be revealed. No, not that kind of revealed. Don't protest I KNOW you were thinking it!
Flirting continues. Friend goes from confused to amused. Other people at table join in. Increase tempo and level... and...
Friend: *moves VEERRRRYYY close* *presses thigh against other guy's thigh* *hand... wanders*
B/f: Ding! Result. Sorry M, you got another one.
M: Sod! Not again. *turns on friend* Don't suppose you're bi are you?
friend: *Confused*
M: Nah, that'd be wishful thinking. Damn it! Every bloody time!
Me: Honestly M, don't you know any straight guys? Even Kinsey said that only 10% of the population is gay, odds are you must get one eventually.
B/f: How is it you can find more gay men in a topless lap dancing club than I can find in a gay bar with hot and cold running go-go boys? It's so unfair.
M: YOU think it's unfair!!
Me: Couldn't you... make your intentions clearer while reeling them in?
B/f: How about I sign? "I'm talking to you because at some point I want us to fuck like bunnies." It'd save time.
M: *glares*
Still, alls well that ends well. I think friend is now dating one of the other people at the table (B/f wishes to point out that 'dating' is not a very appropriate way of describing the relationship). And M remains a perfect target for cruel amusement. I predict she will ignore all men for the next few weeks, exploiting her bi-ness to play with women instead, until her male preference leanings inevitably cause her to swing back to a guy.
WHo, we all know, WILL be gay :)
So it was that chance found me, b/f and a couple of other good friends are at a bar, indulging in our most favourite of pass times - bitching cattily about acquaintences or passers by, occasionally diverting to bitch about politics or start a small rhetoric war on the quality of various alcohols.
So it was that M came in with her new friend.
It has to be noted that her male friend is NOT a b/f or love interest of any kind. Nor is he auditioning for the part. Honest. Really. Look she made it ABUNDANTLY clear to him and all of us. Definitely. uh-huh...
So she and her friend plop themselves down, order drinks and make small talk. We bitch some more, drink some more, tear apart a guy's outfit, some random groping, the usual; when M reveals her true intent.
M: *whispering* Test him guys.
Me: *sighs*
B/f: *rolls eyes*
Both: *FLIRT with friend*
All will be revealed. No, not that kind of revealed. Don't protest I KNOW you were thinking it!
Flirting continues. Friend goes from confused to amused. Other people at table join in. Increase tempo and level... and...
Friend: *moves VEERRRRYYY close* *presses thigh against other guy's thigh* *hand... wanders*
B/f: Ding! Result. Sorry M, you got another one.
M: Sod! Not again. *turns on friend* Don't suppose you're bi are you?
friend: *Confused*
M: Nah, that'd be wishful thinking. Damn it! Every bloody time!
Me: Honestly M, don't you know any straight guys? Even Kinsey said that only 10% of the population is gay, odds are you must get one eventually.
B/f: How is it you can find more gay men in a topless lap dancing club than I can find in a gay bar with hot and cold running go-go boys? It's so unfair.
M: YOU think it's unfair!!
Me: Couldn't you... make your intentions clearer while reeling them in?
B/f: How about I sign? "I'm talking to you because at some point I want us to fuck like bunnies." It'd save time.
M: *glares*
Still, alls well that ends well. I think friend is now dating one of the other people at the table (B/f wishes to point out that 'dating' is not a very appropriate way of describing the relationship). And M remains a perfect target for cruel amusement. I predict she will ignore all men for the next few weeks, exploiting her bi-ness to play with women instead, until her male preference leanings inevitably cause her to swing back to a guy.
WHo, we all know, WILL be gay :)