Spark In Darkness

This is something I have been debating ever since the Uganda genocide law was proposed (and, to the people trying to distract from the evils of that law – yes it IS genocide. Just because GBLT people are the target or because it’s being justified by the religion you share doesn’t make it any less genocidal) and is only strengthened by the horrendous sentence of 14 years hard labour for Steven Monjeza and Tiwonge Chimbalanga who tried to marry. 14 years of hard labour because they loved each other.

In response the world’s nations have… tutted under their breath, declared how disappointed they are. And then continued as normal. Most nations reacted much the same to Uganda, I think only Sweden actually threatened any kind of consequences.

And I have to wonder, how much commitment to LGBT rights we actually have, as nations, as charities, as people? When LGBTs can be executed just for being, when we can be thrown in prison for over a decade for loving, when our existence is a crime punishable by death or the next thing to it – and we just carry on business as normal? Maybe spend a second to give a rueful shake of our head and say how so terrible it is. Then… move on? Is that it? I mean, really? Is that our stance on these crimes? Is this the extent of how angry, how outraged, how disgusted we are?

Because it seems pretty weak. It seems pretty empty. It seems pretty indifferent, seems like just a damn token gesture. It doesn’t matter, but we have to say the words. It’s not important, but we have to cover ourselves.

And that’s not a good feeling at all. Not only does it make me despair of the international community, nations et al actually giving a damn or doing something about the suffering, death and even massacres of GBLT people (and my expectations of these are pretty low already, especially given how quick people are to minimise GBLT persecution around the world) and it also angers and concerns me thinking about just how much the powers that be in our countries and international bodies actually give a damn about the persecution of GBLT people.

It worries me and it worries me more that I don’t know what the answer is. After all, international aid prevents millions from starving in these nations – even if their governments, churches and even themselves are bigots who would be happy to see me and other GBLT people imprisoned or killed – I can’t condone withdrawing what already minimal help the third world receives. But at the same time it galls greatly to think that my tax and charity money is going to help people who don’t see me as a full human being.

I wonder how bad things need to be for GBLT people before the international community brings up any consequences at all? And since we have countries where GBLTs can be openly tortured and killed for simply existing… well, the only answer I can think is that it CANNOT get bad enough to force the world’s nations to care – to force just about ANY of the world’s nations to care, let alone for them to care collectively. The utter worst treatment of GBLT people imaginable is tolerable, acceptable, not worth getting upset about and most certainly not worth acting on. Our existence can be seen as criminal, as sinful, as reason for torture and execution – and we get a disapproving head shake, the tutting under the breath, the rote recitations of disapproval and then, their cover well established, it’s back to business as usual.

We do not see sanctions for the abuse of GBLTs. There’s never any talk of UN intervention. There is no withdrawal of aid. There are no trade consequences. There are no diplomatic consequences. Nations who threaten to withdraw their ambassadors for the slightist little tiff, will not even consider it in response to genocide against GBLT people. Charities and NGOs do not withdraw from a grossly homophobic and transphobic nation. Supra-national unions like the Commonwealth will do no more than express disapproval over homophobic and transphobia. No matter how severe, no matter how brutal – no matter if the persecution amounts to outright genocide, nothing is done and, usually, nothing is even said.

And that is a chilling indication of how much our lives are worth.

This piece originally appeared at Womanist Musings where Renee has very generously allowed my random musings to appear on her excellent blog

Children are too young to learn about ANY kind of sexuality. It’s a common refrain, when you discuss teaching children about homosexuality or homophobia. Children are too young for that. Too vulnerable. Too young to understand. They’re not homophobic, they hasten to add, oh no, they don’t want to teach kids about ANY sexuality! And that includes heterosexuality!

And I really want to know where the idea came from that you DIDN’T teach sexuality (and gender identity) to your 5, 8, 10, 14 (or however old you think is too frail to hear about the GBLT folk) year old?

Do they have a mother and father? A grandmother and grandfather? Aunts and uncles? How many couples do they know, how many husbands and wives in nicely matched pairs? How many boyfriends and girlfriends?

How many times have you spoken about “when they grow up?” How many times does that involve a partner of the opposite gender? Ever spoken about future wives/husbands?

Do you tease them and make little jokes? When you see him with a female friend do you tease him “is that your girlfriend?” Do you ask the same about his male friends?

Do they watch television? Do they see an endless stream of heterosexuals and heterosexual couples? From animated movies to those dreadfully dull child-friendly fluff – how many of them have heterosexuality craftily inserted in there? Even Peanuts had (straight, naturally) love interests!

Do they read books? How many princes rescue princesses? How many children have a mummy and a daddy? How many boy friends and girl friends are there? Even Goldilocks had a mummy bear and a daddy bear. Beauty met the Beast – but Beast was always a guy and Beauty was always a girl. The kiss that woke Sleeping Beauty was never from another woman, Prince Charming never rode to Prince Even-More-Charming’s rescue.

Do they go to school? Do they learn about history – with kings married to queens? With great men – and their wives? Lots of heterosexual partners presented week after week? Do they study English and literature – and again see man and woman, eternally linked and assumed again and again and again? Have they studied religion? Do they go to church?

Have you told them there are clothes for boys and clothes for girls? Does you son wear a dress? Does he wear pink? Does your daughter play with dolls that need burping and putting to sleep, or dolls with guns? Does she get an easy bake oven or a transformer?

Were his baby blankets blue? Were hers pink?

Does mummy do the housework? Does daddy fix the car?

See, I was taught about heterosexuality and “proper” gender presentation from a very very young age. It was taught by my family, by my friends, by my teachers, by my books and by the TV. It glared out from every corner. The lessons were impossible to miss. It was impossible NOT to learn about sexuality. Only it was never my sexuality – never me. Only “appropriate” sexuality.

And do you even begin to realise how long and how hard it was to unlearn all that?

We teach sexuality from the cradle, from the very second they open their eyes we force these lessons on our children. But so some of our kids those lessons are just plain wrong, and for the rest they just teach them that we don’t exist.

You already teach kids sexuality – but you don’t tell them the whole story and that ignorance can hurt all of them – and it certainly hurts us.

Our trans brothers and sisters are very much targets for abuse - and rarely are their issues or their pain given the attention or respect they deserve.

As LGBT people we need to recognise that all of us suffer and that all of us face hatred, violence and death - and we cannot let any of our stories, our problems or the abuses against us go untold and ignored.

Like always, we have to see the bad so that we can remember why we keep fighting and keep working

Stan Lansdell was a social worker for Bradford Council. Despite this essential and powerful position of trust and protection, he screamed abuse and hate at a 12-13 year old trans girl. The man seems to generally fail at his job as well - but to let hate take you so far as to abuse a child is unconscionable.

In slightly better news the Scottish Parliament has apologised to a trans woman for the terrible way she was treated. The sad thing is she was so treated in the first place - allowing a male guard to search a trans woman is not acceptable and no less intolerable or humiliating for her than it would be for a cis woman.

In Japan, 3 Filipino trans women have been arrested for “faking” marriages. These women would not have had to “fake” papers to show their ACCURATE gender if the law were not backward and discriminatory.

Facebook - if a man’s chest is not considered nudity under your rules then that applies to trans men as well especially since he is at a stage in his transition where his breasts have been removed. As an aside, I can’t really get behind the idea that a woman’s chest has to be covered but a man’s can’t anyway.

And in Michigan Rep Paul Scott lashes out at trans people for some easy bigot votes deciding to make it a priority to prevent trans people having their real sex listed on their driver’s license. Of all the petty small minded acts of spite - this will gain NOTHING for anyone in the state, anyone in the world - but it will harass and generally make trans people’s lives a whole lot harder. An ID with invalid information on it is just going to cause endless hassle everywhere it’s needed - to say nothing of outing that trans person every single time they’re called upon to prove age or their identity. Being outed is dangerous - it’s deadly and far to many trans people have been murdered for this to be considered anything less than a serious threat.

And a classic example of media fail a trans woman is killed in Texas - already showing how little trans’ lives are valued. But the media pulls out all the classic fail of victim blaming (she was found in an area frequented by the homeless and prostitutes as they are so eager to point out) and repeated misgendering. Gah, such lazy intolerance, such utter unwillingness to acknowledge another human being


Respect is not much to ask - and takes little to give. It’s grossly repellent that trans people’s bodies and rights are valued at such a low level - and how casual society is at making their lives as hard as possible.

You need to apologise for this crap

Do you know how hard it is for transpeople to get a job? Do you know how many transpeople live below the poverty line because of prejudice? Do you realise the courage and strength and dedication and hard work it took for Amanda Simpson to reach this level? Do you realise what an achievement this is in such a prejudiced world?


And worse, the format of the joke only makes it more sickening. The straight guy running in horror because “zomg this girl used to be a dude” gods do you know how awful that is? Aside from the ignorance of misgendering someone pre-transition, this runs smack bang into the trans panic defence.

Do you have ANY idea how many people attack trans people and use reactions like this oh-so-funny skit as an excuse for it? Do you have any idea how many times someone screaming “she used to be a dude!!!” is used as an ignorant preface or justification for violence and murder.

Trans people’s blood is spilled with those words. This joke makes light of a legacy of violence you cannot even begin to imagine, Mr. Letterman. That is not acceptable from anyone - and it’s doubly unacceptable to be presented as a mainstream, FUNNY reaction to a trainperson. You are legitimising hate with this. You are legitimising persecution with this. You are justifying the “trans panic” defence with this.


Thankfully several groups have already come out condemning this foolishness. We cannot be silent in the face of such representations. Silence is consent, silence tells people we’re ok with this. Silence tells us this kind of ‘comedy’ is acceptable. Silence ignores the pain and the violence behind such a representation.

Austria approved a bill to allow civil unions! It’s not perfect of course - and we should not settle or stop at cut-price almost marriages because that message is so destructive - but it’s a step forward.

Argentina’s woman of the year is a Trans woman congratulations Ms. Romero!

Despite some grossly homophobic campaign against her Annise Parker won the race to be mayor of Houston. Houston is now the largest US city with an openly gay mayor Double congratulations Ms. Parker.


Closer to home we have:

Lillian Ladele, the marriage registrar who wants to... uh, stop doing her job but still get paid has lost another appeal (of course, Christian organisations, full of love and money, are determined to keep funding her quest for bigotry, to deny GBLT people access to government services and to apply a religious test to government access). Thankfully, the courts are reluctant to agree that government employees should decide who has access to government services based on the prejudices of their religion - because that would be very very very very silly.


Fellow homophobe, Richard Leonard, has been evicted after making life hell for his neighbours with homophobic abuse. This is extremely important - such abuse is intolerable and unacceptable and we need to make that unequivocally clear.