Dear Client – thank you for sharing your germs

[sparkindarkness]

Yes yes, we’re all very impressed by your work ethic. Here you are, dying of advanced Tapir flu and still you came into our office to see my colleague.

No, no contagious disease is going to stop you. We are in awe that, even while clearly dying horribly and messily (and oozily) you still managed to soldier on. Yes, you brave soul, fight on.

Yes, we marvelled as you coughed onto every flat surface, sneezed in our faces , ensured every flat surface was covered with a liberal coating of your phlegm and then waved your hanky around to ensure an even spread of germs (you only used that damn thing occasionally – but what was with the shaking? It was like you were shaking out a duster. Why do this? Why why?)

I suppose we should thank you, because no doubt you have now given us all the opportunity to prove our dedicated fortitude as well. Right during our busy period. Thanks for that

You’re just lucky you didn’t encounter Most-Senior-Partner, who has been known to have contagious employees bodily removed from the premises. He is not amused by germ spreading badness

And you know what’s worse? Some people are forced to work when sick because of arsehole bosses, people who take the piss and exploit and general necessity. I know my dad’s job has a ridiculous policy where they have a common bonus as part of their weekly wage but they lose it for 5 days if they take a day off sick. Yeah, never mind he’s had 3 sick days in 35 years working for them, no discretion, he loses it.

But you? No. You’re high level, we know you have a flexible work schedule and a decent boss and decent conditions – we wrote your employment contract and know your boss and work place. We also know this isn’t urgent because Colleague ranted at length after you left and tried to disinfect her office (she is Not Amused). You weren’t forced to take your germs on holiday, but chose to do so.