Crawling back
Dec. 16th, 2008 12:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sparkindarknessI'm trying to come back but typing for long periods of time hurts and frustrates me. I also have the friends list of DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM to read and catch up on (which I am desperately trying to do). This will take me a while
*cough*I also have to stomp on Kel'Thuzad's corpse because we pwn him mightily*cough*
It's hard to catch up because this is the time of year known as "Visiting" in the family. It deserves a capital. And though it is a time and a practice I used to dislike (and still do) I'm kind of glad this year that it IS happening because it means that the family isn't distintegrating completely
Visiting is a Christmasy kind of thing evolved to make sure that all the cards/presents/pointed-comments-as-to-who-ISN'T-on-your-Christmas-card-list actually got the cards/presents/icy-cold-stare-of-hate. It's also a chance to get together and gossip with people you don't get together and gossip with very often.
Usually this means people who live far from the hub of the family (like my uncle in Peterborough and cousins in London) travel up to our centre and spend 2-3 days going from house to house visiting everyone (and it does take that long because there are so many of us), naturally any relative they happen to visit at meal time/sleep time provides bed and foobin (so the travelling relatives don't have to have undue Christmas expense). Over the years (and this has been going on since the second world war) this has evolved into close relatives with tight schedules going Visiting to catch up and generally that turned into everyone going round to each other's houses for food and booze.
It's a good tradition :) It generally ensures 1-2 weeks of booze and gluttony with every relative you can imagine
But there are RULES. Oh yes there are
1) It is not just rude, but EVIL AND WRONG to have 2 people Visit you at the same time (since this prevents all sides from gossiping about each other). This is your fault EVEN IF someone drops in unnannounced
2) It is RUDE to pre-announce your Visit because family homes are open to all family all the time and ringing before hand to see if you can drop by implies you may not be welcome.
3) It is RUDE to turn up unannounced. Yes, these rules conflict. Tough. This is family, logic does not apply. Generally mentioning quitely and tangentally in passing that you MAY drop round "later" while talking about something completely different is acceptable
4) Not being at home when Visited is a sin for which burning is the only fit punishment. There is no excuse
5) You will be judged by the quality of table you keep. You should always offer food and booze, regardless of hour or how much everyone has eaten - but NEVER a sit down meal. Buffet is the name of the day! There must be enough food to choke an elephant and enough boooze to make it sick.
6) All will pretend that all food is homemade. No matter what. Asking "where did you get this?" or "how much did this cost?" or anything else that implies that Great Aunt Mildred didn't roll her own Sushi is a declaration of war akin to invading Poland.
7) You must eat everywhere you visit. Even if this is the 8th Visit of the day and each has fed you enough to last all week. You must eat and eat well. You must drink and drink a lot. There have been knife fights and bloody vendettas over uncleared plates.
I am sure half of our family traditions exist solely to give us all a reason to be huffy, angry and offended at the rest of the family, y'know.
*cough*I also have to stomp on Kel'Thuzad's corpse because we pwn him mightily*cough*
It's hard to catch up because this is the time of year known as "Visiting" in the family. It deserves a capital. And though it is a time and a practice I used to dislike (and still do) I'm kind of glad this year that it IS happening because it means that the family isn't distintegrating completely
Visiting is a Christmasy kind of thing evolved to make sure that all the cards/presents/pointed-comments-as-to-who-ISN'T-on-your-Christmas-card-list actually got the cards/presents/icy-cold-stare-of-hate. It's also a chance to get together and gossip with people you don't get together and gossip with very often.
Usually this means people who live far from the hub of the family (like my uncle in Peterborough and cousins in London) travel up to our centre and spend 2-3 days going from house to house visiting everyone (and it does take that long because there are so many of us), naturally any relative they happen to visit at meal time/sleep time provides bed and foobin (so the travelling relatives don't have to have undue Christmas expense). Over the years (and this has been going on since the second world war) this has evolved into close relatives with tight schedules going Visiting to catch up and generally that turned into everyone going round to each other's houses for food and booze.
It's a good tradition :) It generally ensures 1-2 weeks of booze and gluttony with every relative you can imagine
But there are RULES. Oh yes there are
1) It is not just rude, but EVIL AND WRONG to have 2 people Visit you at the same time (since this prevents all sides from gossiping about each other). This is your fault EVEN IF someone drops in unnannounced
2) It is RUDE to pre-announce your Visit because family homes are open to all family all the time and ringing before hand to see if you can drop by implies you may not be welcome.
3) It is RUDE to turn up unannounced. Yes, these rules conflict. Tough. This is family, logic does not apply. Generally mentioning quitely and tangentally in passing that you MAY drop round "later" while talking about something completely different is acceptable
4) Not being at home when Visited is a sin for which burning is the only fit punishment. There is no excuse
5) You will be judged by the quality of table you keep. You should always offer food and booze, regardless of hour or how much everyone has eaten - but NEVER a sit down meal. Buffet is the name of the day! There must be enough food to choke an elephant and enough boooze to make it sick.
6) All will pretend that all food is homemade. No matter what. Asking "where did you get this?" or "how much did this cost?" or anything else that implies that Great Aunt Mildred didn't roll her own Sushi is a declaration of war akin to invading Poland.
7) You must eat everywhere you visit. Even if this is the 8th Visit of the day and each has fed you enough to last all week. You must eat and eat well. You must drink and drink a lot. There have been knife fights and bloody vendettas over uncleared plates.
I am sure half of our family traditions exist solely to give us all a reason to be huffy, angry and offended at the rest of the family, y'know.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-16 01:31 pm (UTC)So, totally unrelated to your actual post, but on subject of YOU - the following tidbit was on another journal last night, and gave me a half-second of extreme confusion. I almost sent you a message, but I was too lazy, and now there's a post I can reply to instead :)
* Sparky got neutered last Thursday, poor kid. He really is my sensitive child, my emo kid. He didn't want to be more than a centimeter away from me all that night, and he's been clingy ever since. I feel way, way better now that he's neutered. This way he won't get out of the fence and inflict puppies on someone else's dog. Plus, maybe he'll stop marking so much. Cheer up, emo kid. You are loved. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-16 02:26 pm (UTC)*SHUDDER* aieeeee that makes me wince just thinking about it :0
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-16 02:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-21 01:02 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-16 03:12 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-21 01:03 am (UTC)...
..
.
..
Yeah, that'll happen.
Besides, stupid though it is, it DOES keep the family together, which is something I've worried about since a lot of elderly relatives died and our links are drfiting. Stuff like this keeps family in mind and linked - even if it's just so you can bitch about other relatives
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-16 06:32 pm (UTC)I take it rule #8 is 'a broken arm and dislocated knee don't get you out of Visiting'?
Hope you're healing well enough to enjoy some of the festive season.
S
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-21 01:05 am (UTC)DEATH does not get you out of Visiting. And I mean it. Really.
I'm healing well enough and have good enough pain pills to be mildly irritated and achey, but not excessively impaired :)
(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-17 12:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-12-21 01:07 am (UTC)I'd have no reason to talk to cousin G if I didn't have the other cousins to gossip about :)