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Days of irritation
Apr. 11th, 2005 08:14 pmEver have one thing go wrong that makes everything irritating even though it shouldn't be?
Bad hair day. Now everything, no matter how minor or pointless, is irritating.
It irritates me that none of our crockery matches. Why does it not match? Because everything breaks and is replaced in bits. This is sensible rather than spending a small fortune on a complete set to replace a couple of plates the dishwasher will eat anyway. Aside from anything else, we'd have a million egg cups. But today, it irritates.
And that irritates me. Why do we have so many damn egg cups? It's not like we even like eggs unless they're in something baked! We have a cupboard filled with over a dozen bloody egg cups. Why does ANYONE need ONE egg cup, let alone a dozen?
All of our pots annoy me today. We have a sugar bowl. We've washed it (we used it to mix paint) why didn't the evil washing up eat that one?
And why do inanimate objects hide? What perverse little desire causes them to make our lives a misery? Hairbrushes, TV controls, mobile phones, keys - I don't believe we lose them all the time, we'd be dead as a species if we were that incompetent. It must be someone's fault. And it irritates me.
And while we're on keys - what is really irritating is that no matter WHAT key you use to a lock it will ALWAYS be the wrong one. Always. It doesn't matter if there is only two keys on the key ring. You will ALWAYS use the wrong one first. Sometimes even using it twice before the correct one. Again, there must be a demon because humans CANNOT be that unlucky and dumb.
And razors. Logic dictates they must slllloooowwwwllly lose their sharpness to the general erosion of beard against them. They should not go from evilly sharp blades that can slice you to the bone with a wrong move to blunt awls that tear away four layers of flesh over night. It is not possible. And it irritates.
But what REALLY REALLY irritates me is that someone has decided that buying that "2 in one stuff" instead of REAL shampoo is a good idea. They have also decided that someone who dedicates the best part of every day to taming wil rebellious locks into a sleek, straight cloak of hair needs a conditioner that promotes "wild, bouncing curls." That is... excessively irritating.
Bad hair day. Now everything, no matter how minor or pointless, is irritating.
It irritates me that none of our crockery matches. Why does it not match? Because everything breaks and is replaced in bits. This is sensible rather than spending a small fortune on a complete set to replace a couple of plates the dishwasher will eat anyway. Aside from anything else, we'd have a million egg cups. But today, it irritates.
And that irritates me. Why do we have so many damn egg cups? It's not like we even like eggs unless they're in something baked! We have a cupboard filled with over a dozen bloody egg cups. Why does ANYONE need ONE egg cup, let alone a dozen?
All of our pots annoy me today. We have a sugar bowl. We've washed it (we used it to mix paint) why didn't the evil washing up eat that one?
And why do inanimate objects hide? What perverse little desire causes them to make our lives a misery? Hairbrushes, TV controls, mobile phones, keys - I don't believe we lose them all the time, we'd be dead as a species if we were that incompetent. It must be someone's fault. And it irritates me.
And while we're on keys - what is really irritating is that no matter WHAT key you use to a lock it will ALWAYS be the wrong one. Always. It doesn't matter if there is only two keys on the key ring. You will ALWAYS use the wrong one first. Sometimes even using it twice before the correct one. Again, there must be a demon because humans CANNOT be that unlucky and dumb.
And razors. Logic dictates they must slllloooowwwwllly lose their sharpness to the general erosion of beard against them. They should not go from evilly sharp blades that can slice you to the bone with a wrong move to blunt awls that tear away four layers of flesh over night. It is not possible. And it irritates.
But what REALLY REALLY irritates me is that someone has decided that buying that "2 in one stuff" instead of REAL shampoo is a good idea. They have also decided that someone who dedicates the best part of every day to taming wil rebellious locks into a sleek, straight cloak of hair needs a conditioner that promotes "wild, bouncing curls." That is... excessively irritating.
