International blogging against racism week

[sparkindarkness]

Adding my post to a very important meme - I know I actually missed the week, but I've largely been getting my thoughts together about it, and it's a message that needs to be out there all the time anyway.


Whenever I come across any tangible struggle against racism (or any kind of prejudice) the most common emotion I feel is sadness.

It saddens me that people have to do this

It saddens me that this war is still being fought

It saddens me that this is still an issue.

It saddens me that we aren't past this, that we as a people, as a society, as human beings aren't better than this.

But we aren't - and sometimes I wonder why. Why does this hang on, why is racism still a scourge after decades of fighting it - is hate that strong?

But i sat to wonder - how often do we, as a society, encourage it? Or at least provide an atmoshphere that says that, at least on some level, it's OK to be racist? How often do we give the impression that all of the outrage is just a public face we have to put on, but the sentiments are ok?

I reviewed several of my days, the comments people made - the comments I made, assumptions people made, off hand words and phrases, unnecessary identifiers and it's amazing how it builds up. It's amazing how many times every single day we say or hear or do things that say "yes, it is ok to treat people differently, or negatively because of their race."

Most of it by far seems so harmless, it's unconscious, it's said by people who find the very thought of racism to be vile - but it's still said and I do wonder how much it helps to contribute to the atmosphere that it is OK. Are we all sending out signals, even subtle, low key signals, that racism is ok on some level?

How many actual racist comments do we ignore or let slide? When we're at work or on the internet or out with friend and someone says something we know is offensive, do we say anything? Do we respond to it without condemning it? Do we just get embarrassed and try to change the subject? How many racist jokes do we tell? When we hear them do we protest? Do we smile? Do we laugh?

How many times a day do we send out that subtle message that we're ok with what has been said, that we're ok with the racism?

How many times do we feel the need to identify a random person by their race even though it is utterly irrelevent to the conversation? How often do we make assumptions about people because of their race? How often do we allow the mention of race to fill in several biographical details? How often do we cross the road to avoid the black guy or speak slowly to the east asian? How often do we stare at the south asian with suspicion, especially in these paranoid times?

How often do we send out the message that it's ok to judge people based on race? How often do we send out the message that we do judge based on race?


I wonder how much all of this contributes to the racism in society. If racism is the weed choking us, how much fertile soil do we provide?

Comments

[gnarlycranium.livejournal.com]

The thing is, it's an accepted part of society to be.... um... peopleist. Almost everybody discriminates against practically everybody else every single day. Race is just one of the multitude of excuses. How many times have you head someone make a casual disparaging remark about their SO or family members?

Respect is an alien concept to a depressingly huge number of people. People can't learn to recognize people of other races as fellow human beings, until they learn to recognize OTHER HUMAN BEINGS as human beings. Racism will never end until people learn the concept of basic decency-- it's one symptom of a much larger problem.

This does not mean having to be politically correct all the time either-- some of those jokes ARE funny.

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

I can understand grouping people, categorising people for, well, mental neatness sake - but to assume traits and behaviour because they belong to a racial group really leaves a sour taste in my mouth. I mean, being disparaging about someone because of their behaviour (in ref to the SO or family member) is acceptable. It's perfectly reasonable to diss, disagree with, smackdown or otherwise think/act/speak ill of someone based on your opinion of what they DO. But I think that's a world of difference from doing the same based on what they ARE.

Respect is dying day after day. It's utterly depressing. We are so obsessed on the TINY points that are "other" we completely miss the HUGE points that are "same"

I know people don't like PC, but maybe I'm sensitive to it because I've seen the same thing in homophobia. People tell gay jokes, and yes, some of them are funny - but they still make me uncomfortable, and make me a little warier of the person who tells them (kind of like people who call anything that annoys them or is broken "gay". REALLY sets my teeth on edge, that one).

I imagine the same applies to the huge amounts of misogyny out there - especially on the internet. I've heard people tell some horrifically insulting jokes about women (one I heard recently on WoW was "What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice." And people LAUGHED, gods, some of them are people I consider reasonable, sensible GOOD people and they laugh at such things. I can only imagine what any woman listening on our server would have felt like) and blow anyone who disagrees off as being overly sensitive or PC.

Even when the jokes are tamer and less cutting than that one, the existance just creates the climate where that vile one is acceptable - and that's what bugs me

[gnarlycranium.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I was referring to the categorical insults, as you say based on what the person IS. For instance spouse = old ball and chain. Some people write off those close to them almost as readily as they do strangers-- familiarity breeds contempt, and all that. Judging someone based on their skin color, to me, is absolutely no different than misguided judgements based on someone's clothes, age, weight, sexual preferences, gender, teeth, whatever. Focusing specifically on racism almost seems counterproductive to me, just a bandaid to a bigger problem, and often it magnifies the very issue it's trying to ease. "Look kids, there's the black people, now remember, we should all be VERY NICE TO THE BLACK PEOPLE. Because THE BLACK PEOPLE are just like us, which is why we're singling them out to make this big fuss about HOW BLACK THEY ARE." ...And there was the feminist thing, last week, too-- I got repeatedly labeled a feminist, by a friend... in a complimentary sort of way, but boy howdy if it didn't irritate me anyway, to get pigeonholed like that on an issue that shouldn't even be an issue.

As for jokes... I'm a woman who was punched in the face by a boyfriend. And I gotta tell you, when I heard the two-black-eyes joke, I laughed. A lot. Of course it depends a lot on the context, who's saying it, why they're saying it. Things can be cruel or in bad taste sometimes, but I would never try to say something is totally out of limits, that smacks of censorship, and just seems wrong. Part of the thing about jokes is that they're not supposed to be taken seriously. I'm with George Carlin on this one. "They'll say, 'you can't joke about rape. Rape's not funny.' I say, 'fuck you, I think it's hilarious. How do you like that?' I can prove to you that rape is funny. Picture Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd."

[solid-squid.livejournal.com]

What if you put racism *and* rape into the same, two sentence, joke?

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

I think people focus on racism because it has such a history and major severe factor even today. It is a more obvious, open and pernicious problem

And it is sad that we have to make a major issue about things that shouldn't be an issue. No we don't need a special label for those that want the obvious and have some decent respect

Context is everything which is one of the reasons I didn't blow up when faced with that joke and why I only ever give the person who says "gay" all the time anything more than a cold look. But what I wonder is whether these constant, low level, non-malicious jibes are what creates the atmosphere for the more virulent expressions of racism/homophobia/misogyny. I wonder if, on some level, us laughing at these jokes or telling them with a non-malicious intent sends the message to people that yes, prejudice IS ok and we don't mind.

I wouldn't say it's off limits and that they can't say them, but I also would say that it's not off limits to be offended by it - and even that we should be offended by it.

[lilisonna.livejournal.com]

I think it numbs us at least a little bit. And it makes it that much harder to speak up when the big things hit.

[gnarlycranium.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. It's a good question, but I'd have to say... probably not. But again, it all depends on the context. Sometimes a joke is appropriate. Other times it definitely isn't. Learning to joke about things, and to take jokes, is a matter of developing trust, compassion, and tolerance-- it took me well on 20 years to figure out that somebody poking fun at me isn't ALWAYS intended to be cruelty, but in fact can be a normal way of showing affection. If I had just gotten pissed every time somebody made a joke at my expense, I wouldn't have any friends.

In many heavily religious philosophies, marriage is supposed to be 'sacred' and sex is never spoken of, lest anything crude be mentioned, and no 'bad' words are allowed-- and yet that attitude spawns some of the most perverse, generally screwed up people I can think of. Full contact between people and full understanding isn't possible in a censored world. People have to take the chance to cause offense before they can learn what's offensive and why. This is why Political Correctness is so maddening-- it paints the whole thing with a dehumanizing, wide brush and prevents intelligent discussion. Compassion can't be forced, it has to be learned. Although maybe putting a PC foot down is a good way of telling the kids 'okay THAT word isn't appropriate for this situation, learn HOW and WHEN to use it before you open your mouth'.

There's definitely a background level of contempt, on most things... jokes aren't the worst part, it's the offhand comments that are taken for granted, even otherwise harmless statements that have a tone or spirit that makes them totally wrong. People DO need to speak up more often about this kind of thing.

[bladespark.livejournal.com]

Heh. I've thought some of the same things myself.

You know people used to be prejudiced against Irish immigrants, here in the USA. The thing was that eventually they blended in, and other things came up, and the issue just faded away. But if your skin is a different color, it's harder to just blend into the melting pot. Particularly when it's not just the caucasian majority that insist on bringing it up. How many people who are black, or hispanic, or asian, define themselves in terms of those things first, and as humans, friends, co-workers, etc. second? And how many embrace the negative stereotypes? (I'm thinking of the rap music culture in particular when I say that.) It's a battle that may never be entirely won.

I'm reminded of a comment I got on my journal recently. When talking about something that had nothing whatsoever to do with furry culture, somebody's first response was to declare that they were furry, and that this made them an outsider, an alien to the rest of the human race. That just pretty much boggled my mind. Here was somebody who was first of all defining himself only a furry, and not as anything else, and second of all assuming that being part of an unusual subculture somehow automatically alienated him from everyone who was not part of that subculture. Does being furry mean you'll never be understood by somebody who isn't a fur? I doubt it. And I doubt that being black means that a white person can't relate to you. Being asian doesn't mean that you can't relate to somebody who's not asian. Yes there are different cultures, but under them all we're human beings.

It's when we start thinking of ourselves as humans first, and all the races and religions and subcultures second that we'll finally win the "war," but unfortunately most people would rather partition up humanity and declare which little box they fit in.

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

Anti-irish discrimination is not new here either - it's been here for a while and it will be here for some time to come.

People do insist on dividing themselves - and I can understand holding onto culture. I don't see any problem with people wanting to preserve cultures and practices - but feeding into the worst stereotypes is annoying. this is actually something I am in conflict with myself at the minute and I think I'm going to post about it (or check to see if I have)


This ridiculous "you can't possibly understand me" attitude - using minority status to convey some kind of "special status." Are there some things that those outside will never truly understand? Yes, probably. Do they need to? Will it stop them relating or identifying with you? Will it make you an outsider? Unlikely in the extreme. Yes, somethings outsiders will NEVER understand - but that doesn't have be a gulf. There are things about EVERYONE I will never understand

[lilisonna.livejournal.com]

It's odd. I tend to think of racism as a mostly American problem even though I know that it's present almost everywhere. Maybe I'm just hoping that we're the ones that are backwards and everyone else is making progress.

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

Maybe you're just hoping Americans are the worst at it.

Would that it were so.

[lilisonna.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I think that's much of it. Hope that elsewhere there are places that have gotten their shit together.

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

Sadly progress is very slow in the endless fight against hate. Racism permeates everywhere in the worst possible ways

[solid-squid.livejournal.com]

Although it is present everywhere, the high profile media occurences are almost always in the US. In the case of the UK, there's only so many BNP stories the media can run before people lose interest

[sapphybelle.livejournal.com]

One of my co-workers is Indonesian, she's a lovely girl and a hard worker. Because she gets along with my boss (a stereotypical australian male), he thinks he can make comments like "oh, Janine's off out the back to make some more terrorist bombs" and the other day he said "move your foreign ass, Janine!" to which I gaped at him in dismay. I talked about it with Janine and she said she knows that he's only joking but she does wish that he wouldn't, especially since her sister was injured in a terrorist attack at a hotel. She said that nothing she can say to him makes any difference - he still keeps going.

*le sigh*

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

Extra sighs.

People say things like that and don't realise how much they hurt. They think they're being funny, they think it's just in fun and they know (and the target usually knows) that no malice is intended.

But it still hurts - and what can you say without seeming "oversensitive" or "ultra pc"

[gnarlycranium.livejournal.com]

Sounds like she could use a bit of help, if some other people could mention that his attempts at friendly humor are in somewhat bad taste. It takes a certain comfort level to get away with that kind of thing, more found with friends than simply coworkers. How long has she been in that job I wonder?

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

I think that's another problem - people, especially people who don't come from any kind of minority that may face discrimination (such as a 25-55 year old heterosexual white man from a dominant religion) doesn't realise that they step on other's comfort zones when they say things like that. They don't mean any harm of viciousness but don't get that they're not intimate enough with the person to get away with that

[solid-squid.livejournal.com]

Maybe it would be worth mentioning that it's making you, and probably several other workers, uncomfortable with your work environment too, especially since you know her sister was injured during a terrorist attack. If he realises that other people don't really find the jokes funny, and nor does she, then he might stop making them as often at least.

[sapphybelle.livejournal.com]

Believe me, I've tried. He's just an asshole.

[solid-squid.livejournal.com]

"If racism is the weed choking us, how much fertile soil do we provide?"

Best simile I can think of for this is that we've completely covered the area in concrete (blanket ban on anything remotely racist), but the weeds are starting to break through the thinner parts (people taking advantage of usually legally protected things like religion and using them as an excuse for racism)

Things have been improving though, and most likely will continue to do so, so I think it's just a matter of time until racism is viewed much like the whole Aryan movement which says things like the holocaust never happened. It's just going to take a bit longer since racism has been institutionalised for so long now.

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

Things are getting better, but there are a lot of thin parts still in that concrete and I wonder if with our daily low level prejudices we're scattering fertile soil on top of the concrete

But things are better than they were, a lot better.

[logophilos.livejournal.com]

It's amazing how many times every single day we say or hear or do things that say "yes, it is ok to treat people differently, or negatively because of their race."

Or religion, or sexuality, or dress sense. Or disability. Or class.

Human beings are hard wired to notice differences, and the lizard part of our brain says, KILL KILL KILL. But the bit of us that makes us human, has to, somehow, overcome this basic instinct because we believe, rightly, to give into this, diminishes us. No man is an island, Donne said. That's a plea for us to ignore our hard wiring, and be part of *humanity*. Humans come in all kinds of packaging. That doesn't mean the contents are any less human.

But I don't see this as a war that will be won, because it's not a war, it's a struggle between the two halves of our nature. The reason all the 'isms' keep coming back is because the struggle is hard, and it's easier being a lizard, and letting instinct rule our heads. But if we stop struggling, if everyone's a lizard, then we have to live in a society which treats people differently based on trivial distinctions, and while we we're comfortably giving into our baser needs, we allegedly privileged few find our own rights and freedoms extinguished, limited or perverted.

We must continue to strive to transcend our animal nature, because it not only enriches humanity, it enriches ourselves. The irony is that more people will exercise their wobbly butts than their wobbly minds, even though atherosclerosis of society's moral perception is a damn sight more urgent to sort out.

[sparkindarkness.livejournal.com]

It is a struggle with ourselves, we are always ready to judge others. We are better than the sum of our instincts

But at the same time I think we feed into those instincts, those animal prejudices with casual prejudiced comments. We all struggle against the lizard brain, but with these casual statements we are saying, on some level, that the lizard brain is right, we encourage the lizard brain. We not only give in on our struggle, but we weaken those around us in the same way - and create a society that on some level supports the lizard brain

If we are in a constant struggle to our baser, crueller, prejudiced natures then I think that it is all the more important that we don't feed it