There is a rule
May. 10th, 2009 02:46 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sparkindarknessAnd the rule is, any alcoholic drink left unguarded in the presence of Sparky will be consumed by said Sparky.* If said alcoholic drink is not to Sparky’s liking then Sparky will:
1) Add or change said drink until it is palatable
2) Drink it anyway then complain to the maker of said drink about their appalling taste in alcohol.
This is the rule, it has been with us since the dawn of drunkenness. It is known :P
Beloved has shared roof space and drinking time with Sparky for many many many years now through the consumption of a lot of alcohol. A great deal of alcohol. Metric fucktons in fact. Therefore he is fully appraised of the rule and has witnessed it on many occasions.
Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager. I further add that all right thinking people will agree with Sparky when Sparky complain most bitterly about the crime of adding cranberry juice to perfectly decent Apple Sour. I would elaborate by saying that it is an act of charity on the part of Sparky to drink said appalling mix in the legitimate expectation that the glass will be refilled by unadulterated Apple Sour. Which Sparky will then consume, of course (assuming no wolverines are detected). But the alcohol quality of the house will still have been briefly improved, which is something.
Really, after all these years he should KNOW this.
Sometimes Beloved is totally unreasonable, y’know.
*This is a sub rule of the general principle “everything edible belongs to Sparky unless he doesn’t want it or it is guarded by rabid wolverines.”
1) Add or change said drink until it is palatable
2) Drink it anyway then complain to the maker of said drink about their appalling taste in alcohol.
This is the rule, it has been with us since the dawn of drunkenness. It is known :P
Beloved has shared roof space and drinking time with Sparky for many many many years now through the consumption of a lot of alcohol. A great deal of alcohol. Metric fucktons in fact. Therefore he is fully appraised of the rule and has witnessed it on many occasions.
Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager. I further add that all right thinking people will agree with Sparky when Sparky complain most bitterly about the crime of adding cranberry juice to perfectly decent Apple Sour. I would elaborate by saying that it is an act of charity on the part of Sparky to drink said appalling mix in the legitimate expectation that the glass will be refilled by unadulterated Apple Sour. Which Sparky will then consume, of course (assuming no wolverines are detected). But the alcohol quality of the house will still have been briefly improved, which is something.
Really, after all these years he should KNOW this.
Sometimes Beloved is totally unreasonable, y’know.
*This is a sub rule of the general principle “everything edible belongs to Sparky unless he doesn’t want it or it is guarded by rabid wolverines.”
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(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 02:02 am (UTC)Lawyers are WEIRD.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 02:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 02:38 am (UTC)Would Sparky care for some warm crab dip and tortilla chips?
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 02:42 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 02:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 05:33 am (UTC)*sips Ardbeg*
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 08:08 am (UTC)Oooh, you'd be singing in a higher register if you ever did that my drink! And *good* lager is definitely not to be messed with. If he was drinking crap, then he probably couldn't tell the difference :)
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 03:46 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 03:57 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-10 05:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:26 pm (UTC)It's safe. If I want to dilute my lime cordial I'll use water - it'll amount to the same thing :P
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:26 pm (UTC)And yes, yes he would. Nom nom nom nom
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:27 pm (UTC)I'm not a major fan of any kind of beer, even real ale tbh. Which is why I have to mix it to make it acceptable
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:28 pm (UTC)See, I've never been a fan of beer, any kind. I keep my lime juice handy :)
Beloved cannot be trusted not to drink crap. he drinks GROLSCH for gods' sake!
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 01:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 02:14 pm (UTC)Your rules about food and drink seem a lot like mine...
If I want tea I am allowed to demand it be made for me.
If there is avocado on your plate and you are not eating it fast enough it is mine. (My entire family shares this one. Avocado must be defended with forks!)
If you are foolish enough to have some form of extremely yummy-seeming food without having had the forethought to prepare some for me, prepare to have your plate raided! It's your own fault for eating it in front of me!
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 02:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 08:42 pm (UTC)Heh, on a slightly related note, I may wind up training to be a Bartender.
Also in response to the last post I commented on. The WoD stuff would be the top entry when my journal is clicked. much like the way your journal shows all the latest entries as the first thing at the top of the page. I guess I should have been more specific. So here's a direct link: http://home-of-usher.livejournal.com/88073.html
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-11 10:06 pm (UTC)http://www.ardbeg.com/
Ardbeg Single Islay Malt Scotch Whisky.
:-D
http://www.shmaltz.com/ He'Brew Jewbelation 12 is one of a handful of American beers I'll drink other than my own homebrew.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-12 12:05 am (UTC)*wink, wink, have fun with that.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-14 01:00 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-14 01:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-14 01:03 pm (UTC)But but... I like Midori! Damn those wolverines!
There is a rule. Anyone who puts the kettle on will make enough tea or coffee for everyone in the house. It is known. Not doing so is a sin against mankind. Never ever make food unless everyone else present is also eating - or the food will be declared communal. It is known
Never really been a fan of avocado I find them waxy.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-14 01:04 pm (UTC)Absinthe... only when I'm drunk already. I LOATHE aniseed. I just cannot abide the taste or smell of it.
It's a job we always have need to!
I'm just not thinking straight these days, I seem to get confused easily - I went to the first ever posts in the journal :) I shll poke and nosy
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-17 06:08 am (UTC)heh I take it you're not a fan of licorice. ;)
I will leave updates as to my alcohol tending progress.
yay for nosy posts. I have made replies. The replies have questions.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-11-18 11:54 pm (UTC)As a bribe, may I offer you this recipe for a Russian Leprechaun?
In a rocks glass filled with large cubes of ice, pour equal parts of premium vodka, amaretto, Bailey's Irish cream and Kahlua. Stir gently and sip to your heart's delight. Mmmmm Will that work as a suitable bribe? ^^
(no subject)
Date: 2011-11-29 12:34 pm (UTC)Sorry i don't always check dreamwidth, more my blog and lj so I'm a little late getting to comments
And that sounds delicious :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-11-29 02:43 pm (UTC)You really should come over to
the dark sideDreamwidth, we have coooookies. >:)