Our Existence is not offensive

One of the more depressing things I see is how outraged people can be with the mere evidence of our existence. People will mouth happy words of “oh I’m not a homophobe.. but” or “I don’t hate gays, but..” and then they go on to prove it – because inevitably they’re pouting about our DARING to exist and not be closeted. Often they will talk about people “rubbing homosexuality in their faces” or “forcing it down their throats” (yeah, I’m not touching that one, it’s far too easy) or “not wanting to see it.” Which inevitably comes down to “get back in the closet!”

Which is, of course, pretty toxic homophobia.

These people will only be happy with us dead or invisible – when you look at the tiniest, slightest suggestions of someone being gay or lesbian that they DEMAND be censored or excluded it’s clear that it’s not sex or the explicit they care about – it’s the fact we EXIST that bothers them.

We have, as always, some depressing examples to call on.

In Canada, minister for Citizenship, Immigration and Multiculturalism Minister Jason Kenney, decides to edit gay rights out of Canada’s history. Immigrants to Canada are given documents when applying for citizenship to help learn about their new country – an extremely good idea. These documents originally included reference to Canada’s extensive progress on gay rights – including decriminalisation and gay marriage rights. These were then removed, apparently by Kenney, whose party fought to (and failed) repeal the gay marriage law. Words cannot express how important this information is – imagine if you are gay and newly arrived in Canada – and you come from a nation where homophobia is legally encouraged and enshrined? They need to know they have rights against such victimisation – similarly people with homophobic attitudes from nations that encourage, promote and enforce such persecution need to know that it’s not ok. This could quite literally cost lives.

To exclude this is, frankly, an act of pure spite.

In Russia, religious and nationalist groups try to ban St. Petersburg pride parade – again, the mere presence of gay is found so objectionable and hateful it must be stopped.

In Mississippi, the Itawamba School district decided it was better to cancel an entire prom, than to allow Constance McMillen bring her female partner as her date. They would rather have a private prom – where they can legally be bigots – or no prom at all (and Constance taking the blame for their hatred from her spiteful, homophobic class mates) rather than *gasp* have a lesbian be out of the closet! She has, incredibly bravely, fought this and the court has ruled her rights have been violated – but they don’t seem to be doing anything about it.

Florida, horrified by all those gays on TV, is concerned that the tax credits it offers to movie studios to make films within the state  should not apply to films with, ZOMG GAYS!!! The old spectre of family values is raised again (what about our families?) and the evil of even seeing us on screen must be stopped (hey, don’t worry Republicans, if you see us on screen we’re probably going to die soon anyway)

Johnny Weir is not going to appear on Stars on Ice because he is considered “not family-friendly.” Uh-huh. Doesn’t take a genius to read between those lines now, does it?

The Washington Post was inundated by outraged protests. Why? Because they showed a photograph of 2 men kissing when covering DC’s new same-sex marriage law. Some of the comments were grossly homophobic and used disgusting slurs. We exist – our KISSING is not obscene, damn it. Our mere existence is not offensive. Our love not something filthy that needs to be censored!

In Albania 400 protestors take to the street in outrage that one of their Big Brother Contestants is gay! Because a gay man on television is so horrific, y‘know.

In Bulgaria skinheads  attacked gay activists who were protesting a law that bans depictions of gay people – because gays are just too damn awful for poor straight eyes.

In Malaysia gays can now be seen on television! So long as they go straight by the end of the film. Because that becomes a moral redemption story. Kind of like how British programmes can show drug use so long as they show the consequences of it. Because that is “good triumphing over evil.“ Yeah – no thanks. Being invisible would be better.

We exist.

Our existence is not threatening.

We have a right to live in this world. We have a right to exist. We have a right to be seen.

We shouldn’t have to hide. It shouldn’t be a crime to show us in the media. It shouldn’t be a matter of supreme offence to see us or to have us move openly through life.

This is extreme bigotry pure and simple – it’s objection to our very right to live and it’s disgusting how widespread and acceptable it is.

Spreading the word: Kelland and support for the victims of Priest abuse

Paul Bens has a special deal with his book Kelland.

Any profits he makes on this book in the second quarter will go to SNAP (Suvivors Network of those Abused By Priests) a vital resource for people abused by priests.

In all this debate with the natural rage at the Catholic church's actions and the returning evasions and defensiveness, the needs and stories of the victims are being badly trampled. Any resource for them in this time is sorely needed