Marriage & civil unions

I’ve never been in favour of civil unions/domestic partnerships/relationship-that-is-like-marriage-but-isn’t-because-the-religious-types-freak for gay people and then ‘marriage’ for heterosexuals. I don’t agree with them because separate but equal NEVER is. I don’t agree with them because having 2 different names for the same damn thing makes it EASY to discriminate. I don’t agree with them because it’s OFFICIAL recognition that gay people don’t deserve ‘marriage.’

All this is pretty well known.

But there’s a much better idea. The idea that ALL legal unions should be civil unions. Gay, straight, gender neutral and any future arrangements we make . And marriage become the pure religious ceremony - similar to, say, Mass or Confirmation.

And I agree - firmly and passionately. Let us divorce the legal from the baggage the churches keep throwing at it. And if this were a movement 50 years ago or 50 years (or however long it takes to achieve marriage equality) from now, I would completely agree and fight alongside.

But not now.

Because now it would be impossible to divorce it from the marriage equality debate. If it happened now it WOULDN’T be about separating legal and religious marriages - it would be about keeping the gays away from marriage. Because that’s how it would reach various legislatures and that’s how it would be sold and even if it wasn’t said overtly, it would be the tacit understanding. Because that is how civil union has been used so far - a way to keep the nasty gayness out of marriage.

So I don’t think it would be possible to separate them both now outside of that context.

If we tried now we would be admitting that the church has the power to define what is and is not marriage.

We would be admitting that they are RIGHT to exclude homosexuals, that their discrimination is acceptable - and I don’t care what any book says, they are most certainly not right and it is not acceptable. Apart from anything else, most churches seem to be positively blase about people married in other faiths or married after divorce or any other marriages that strictly speaking they should consider naughty - but they’re not trying to force the law to pander to those dogmas. We would be admitting that their prejudice is a legitimate concern - and what enrages me beyond thought is that we KEEP DOING THIS. We keep giving credence to these bigots.

We would be creating a cut price marriage. And even if it DID apply to all civil unions the context of the time would ensure that most of the heterosexuals would consider themselves ‘married’ while ‘civil unions’ are used to point out that gays can’t/shouldn’t get married (which, ironically ignores the fact that I am married religiously). It would be another note in the chorus of “gay people are inferior” song that is constantly being broadcast. And it is to the backing of that song that rights are denied and bodies are devalued.



It’s a great idea. And one I would support and fight for. But here and now I don’t think it could work. Because it would be seen as part of the marriage equality battle - and a way of protecting marriage from gay people, not a way to protect the law from religion.

Organised religion treats me as their enemy

Sir Ian Mckellan recently said "I increasingly see organized religion as actually my enemy. They treat me as their enemy," said the British actor, who came out 20 years ago. "Not all Christians, of course. Not all Jews, not all Muslims. But the leaders. . . . Why should I take the judgment of a declared celibate about my sexual needs? He's basing his judgment on laws that would fit life in the Bronze Age. So if I'm lost to God, organized religion is to blame."

And, increasingly, I find myself agreeing with him. I become more and more afraid of and angry towards organised religion. Naturally not all members of organised religions are ignorant homophobes - not even close. Some are passionately in favour of gay rights.

But organised religion is probably THE biggest force for homophobia today. It is the loudest cheerleader for hate, the most passionate opponent of our rights and equality and the must virulent attacking force against us. Increasingly, when I see prominent displays of religious faith I shrink back - because it tells me this is a place and an organisation that hates me and would strip me of everything I have if it could. I fear it as one of the most virulent sources of hate against me and my life.

Catholic church Gay Unions threaten fabric of society Apparently we’ll harm children, spouses, education, the common good and the intrinsic dignity of the human person. Oh and while our unions are a threat to society cohabiting without marrying is inherently sinful. SO basically the Catholics to gays: fuck you.

Catholic church had to conclude that, no, the sex abuse scandal was NOT the fault of gay people They tried so hard to Blame us for their harbouring, protecting and hiding paedophiles and their abuses I’d demand an apology - but if we start asking the Catholic church to apologise for it’s venomous hate we’d have no time for anything else

And let’s not forget that the Catholic church wants us to keep the hell out of the Vatican, and is willing to screw the poor and toss aside all that ‘Christian charity‘ in favour of attacking gay people.

But it is nice to see Christian denominations that spend so much time spitting at each other coming together in their mutual prejudice. Touching, ain’t it? Of course one signatory there is Rev. Peter J. Akinola Primate of the Anglican Church of Nigeria, Bishop of Abuja. Who wants to throw gay people in prison

Then we have Bishops blaming the break up of straight families on homosexuals. Yeah, right.

Religious pro-hate group that set out to deliberately break the hate crime law was a disaster - and actually included someone from a hate group. Someone who travelled to Uganda to encourage their little “let’s kill the homos” law.

Which is, of course, a virulent anti-gay law that has been met with, at best, Anglican indifference and Anglican and Evangelical support. Further supported by the Orthodox, Pentecostal, Seventh Day Adventist and Muslim religions in Uganda as well as American Evangelical leaders promoting and supporting homophobia in Uganda and elsewhere


And these are just SOME of the link from just the last month or so.


Really, I think Sir Ian Mckellan has hit the nail on the head. In fact, he may have been far too moderate and forgiving.