Beloved is a wonderfully intelligent man.

It’s important to remember that. He is well regarded in his profession for his ability to do things to computers that should be illegal and make me wonder if he is cheating on me with a PC. His abilities with maths give me a migraine trying to follow them. He is practical on a level I can never grasp, able to take broken appliances, technology, ANYTHING, tinker with them for a few minutes and make them work again (of course, he’d never USE them again because they’re OBSOLETE and he needs the newest model shredder. Gods forbid we have an OUTDATED paper cutter!)

Sooooo when he does something stupid my violent reaction is totally justified, right? Because he must be doing it on purpose. To torture me. Clearly.


So I go hunting in the freezer for dinner - defrost a corpse for the tasty nummy meat within. I worry a little because Beloved packed the freezer and his labels require... creative interpretations at times. But no, every label looks right, everything looks fine until... I find the MINCE.

Yes, lean beef MINCE. He has happily labelled it, correctly and clearly.

All 5lbs of it.

In one bag.

ONE bag.


So, I have 2 questions I need people to answer for me.

1) Exactly what, in the name of all that is holy, am I supposed to do with many many meal’s worth of meat frozen into one huge lump?

2) Would I be justified in heaving the giant mass of meat at his head?

Oh look, he fixed it....

Beloved: Ok, it's defrosted (finally) so I've split it up and am now re-freezing it - no problem.

Yes, yes he did.

Thankfully the packets of future food poisoning had only been in the freezer for a few minutes.

Now I am cooking. I am cooking several days wirth of mincy meals (meat loaf, chilli, lasagne - hmmmmmm lasagne nommy - bolognase, something we call ghoulash but probably isn't, burrito fixins) that can be eaten or frozen. The kitchen is full and messy. I am keeping a running commentary for Beloved so he is fully aware whose fault this is. At length.

Thankfully, taking

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