Ahhh,,, but I wanna!

My beloved fiance has taken me out drinking because my angst ridden guilt is getting too much for his cheerful sunniness (NO! Darren and Rick are NOT Mary Sues. No. Really. Arrggh... Ok, I admit it, they really, really are. Except they both have bits of me and they both have bits of him.)

So, we're in our local (and is there any greater pleasure than going into a 400 year old pub and having the bar maid pour your pint before you even reach the bar? Well, yes... but pleasures you can enjoy in public. OK public pleasures you wouldn't be arrested for. Actually, in my home town you would probably get cheers and catcalls than anything else.) And then another group come in...

Me: Ooooh! Look at tha-Ow...
F: Stop! We're having a nice night out.
Me: I AM! Let go of my hair.
F: You wouldn't be thinking of commenting would you?
Me: Oh this is so unfair! You expect me to keep silent?
F: We're being NICE.
Me: nice?! This is a public service.
F: Bitching about the badly dressed is not public service and not good for a nice night out.
Me: It's ESSENTIAL! LOOK AT THEM! Orange and green?! Those SHOES! That ratty goatee! Oh ple-ow.
F: Behave.
Me: LOOK! How can I possibly resist? Never have so many people so badly dressed. It's a new record!
F: Did anyone tell you that you're excessively gay?
Me: well dressed and excessively gay, thank you...

I'm sorry, straight people would have commented. Really. They would. Ok, straight men may not have.... They were really badly dressed, honest. REALLY!

Is it a crime to have such incredible taste? Or just my burden to bear?