sparkindarkness (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sparkindarkness) wrote2009-05-10 02:46 am
sparkindarkness) wrote2009-05-10 02:46 am
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There is a rule
And the rule is, any alcoholic drink left unguarded in the presence of Sparky will be consumed by said Sparky.* If said alcoholic drink is not to Sparky’s liking then Sparky will:
1) Add or change said drink until it is palatable
2) Drink it anyway then complain to the maker of said drink about their appalling taste in alcohol.
This is the rule, it has been with us since the dawn of drunkenness. It is known :P
Beloved has shared roof space and drinking time with Sparky for many many many years now through the consumption of a lot of alcohol. A great deal of alcohol. Metric fucktons in fact. Therefore he is fully appraised of the rule and has witnessed it on many occasions.
Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager. I further add that all right thinking people will agree with Sparky when Sparky complain most bitterly about the crime of adding cranberry juice to perfectly decent Apple Sour. I would elaborate by saying that it is an act of charity on the part of Sparky to drink said appalling mix in the legitimate expectation that the glass will be refilled by unadulterated Apple Sour. Which Sparky will then consume, of course (assuming no wolverines are detected). But the alcohol quality of the house will still have been briefly improved, which is something.
Really, after all these years he should KNOW this.
Sometimes Beloved is totally unreasonable, y’know.
*This is a sub rule of the general principle “everything edible belongs to Sparky unless he doesn’t want it or it is guarded by rabid wolverines.”
1) Add or change said drink until it is palatable
2) Drink it anyway then complain to the maker of said drink about their appalling taste in alcohol.
This is the rule, it has been with us since the dawn of drunkenness. It is known :P
Beloved has shared roof space and drinking time with Sparky for many many many years now through the consumption of a lot of alcohol. A great deal of alcohol. Metric fucktons in fact. Therefore he is fully appraised of the rule and has witnessed it on many occasions.
Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager. I further add that all right thinking people will agree with Sparky when Sparky complain most bitterly about the crime of adding cranberry juice to perfectly decent Apple Sour. I would elaborate by saying that it is an act of charity on the part of Sparky to drink said appalling mix in the legitimate expectation that the glass will be refilled by unadulterated Apple Sour. Which Sparky will then consume, of course (assuming no wolverines are detected). But the alcohol quality of the house will still have been briefly improved, which is something.
Really, after all these years he should KNOW this.
Sometimes Beloved is totally unreasonable, y’know.
*This is a sub rule of the general principle “everything edible belongs to Sparky unless he doesn’t want it or it is guarded by rabid wolverines.”
no subject
Your rules about food and drink seem a lot like mine...
If I want tea I am allowed to demand it be made for me.
If there is avocado on your plate and you are not eating it fast enough it is mine. (My entire family shares this one. Avocado must be defended with forks!)
If you are foolish enough to have some form of extremely yummy-seeming food without having had the forethought to prepare some for me, prepare to have your plate raided! It's your own fault for eating it in front of me!
no subject
But but... I like Midori! Damn those wolverines!
There is a rule. Anyone who puts the kettle on will make enough tea or coffee for everyone in the house. It is known. Not doing so is a sin against mankind. Never ever make food unless everyone else present is also eating - or the food will be declared communal. It is known
Never really been a fan of avocado I find them waxy.