There is a rule

[sparkindarkness]

And the rule is, any alcoholic drink left unguarded in the presence of Sparky will be consumed by said Sparky.* If said alcoholic drink is not to Sparky’s liking then Sparky will:

1) Add or change said drink until it is palatable
2) Drink it anyway then complain to the maker of said drink about their appalling taste in alcohol.

This is the rule, it has been with us since the dawn of drunkenness. It is known :P

Beloved has shared roof space and drinking time with Sparky for many many many years now through the consumption of a lot of alcohol. A great deal of alcohol. Metric fucktons in fact. Therefore he is fully appraised of the rule and has witnessed it on many occasions.

Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager. I further add that all right thinking people will agree with Sparky when Sparky complain most bitterly about the crime of adding cranberry juice to perfectly decent Apple Sour. I would elaborate by saying that it is an act of charity on the part of Sparky to drink said appalling mix in the legitimate expectation that the glass will be refilled by unadulterated Apple Sour. Which Sparky will then consume, of course (assuming no wolverines are detected). But the alcohol quality of the house will still have been briefly improved, which is something.

Really, after all these years he should KNOW this.

Sometimes Beloved is totally unreasonable, y’know.




*This is a sub rule of the general principle “everything edible belongs to Sparky unless he doesn’t want it or it is guarded by rabid wolverines.”

Comments

[harald387.livejournal.com]

Lime juice and lager?

Lawyers are WEIRD.

[mrmeval.livejournal.com]

*hides* Ardbeg in titanium vault.

[brownkitty.livejournal.com]

Sparky is clearly feline.

Would Sparky care for some warm crab dip and tortilla chips?

[makarov.livejournal.com]

Sparky needs Camo Lager Black Ice (10.5 % alc by vol, & $1.39 USD a 24 oz can at the local liquor store)

[logophilos.livejournal.com]

"Therefore I think it is grossly unjust and clearly grossly unfair of him to complain about the lime juice that has been added to his lager."

Oooh, you'd be singing in a higher register if you ever did that my drink! And *good* lager is definitely not to be messed with. If he was drinking crap, then he probably couldn't tell the difference :)

[seryan.livejournal.com]

Are you sure you're not a cat?

[hippieflowergal.livejournal.com]

Well, it sounds reasonable to me. I think Beloved has some strange ideas of yours and mine. (When it comes to alcohol, it's all mine, mwahaha!)

[mel-redcap.livejournal.com]

you don't like American beer? How about Australian? You can have my share of the world's Australian beer (I don't want it, all beer is icky to my tastebuds) and I'll keep the wolverines between you and my Midori, mmmkay? :D

Your rules about food and drink seem a lot like mine...

If I want tea I am allowed to demand it be made for me.

If there is avocado on your plate and you are not eating it fast enough it is mine. (My entire family shares this one. Avocado must be defended with forks!)

If you are foolish enough to have some form of extremely yummy-seeming food without having had the forethought to prepare some for me, prepare to have your plate raided! It's your own fault for eating it in front of me!

[home-of-usher.livejournal.com]

Keep your lagers and lime juice. But how do you feel about Absinthe and liquours? The sweet kinds of stuff?


Heh, on a slightly related note, I may wind up training to be a Bartender.

Also in response to the last post I commented on. The WoD stuff would be the top entry when my journal is clicked. much like the way your journal shows all the latest entries as the first thing at the top of the page. I guess I should have been more specific. So here's a direct link: http://home-of-usher.livejournal.com/88073.html

[tameiki]

With you permission I would like to add your journal to my subscriptions. I really like that you make me think, your posts are also entertaining, and I am in love with your Beloved stories :)

As a bribe, may I offer you this recipe for a Russian Leprechaun?

In a rocks glass filled with large cubes of ice, pour equal parts of premium vodka, amaretto, Bailey's Irish cream and Kahlua. Stir gently and sip to your heart's delight. Mmmmm Will that work as a suitable bribe? ^^